Almost every person talks to themselves. Self-talk is a chain of thoughts and monologues prevailing in our minds. This self-talk is sometimes based on criticism, motivation, childish behaviour, maturity, etc. It’s often linked to past negative or positive incidents, moral values, core beliefs, and various mental processes. Sometimes self-talk even affects your inner and outer worlds, as thoughts are driven by negative thoughts and feelings. Generally, it happens that one negative thought gives rise to several negative thoughts that then affect self-esteem, ill-mannered behaviour, etc. In some of the worst cases, they also drag a person towards addiction, mental health issues, and anti-social activities.
Common self-talk patterns
- Self Blaming
In any bad situation, you blame yourself and, in some cases, even punish yourself. For instance, if a person had an accident on the road and you were walking side by side, you would still find your fault, correlate and connect yourself to that bad event, and consider yourself responsible.
- Catastrophizing
Catastrophizing usually creates fear and overthinking of imaginary negative results. Your minds always dwell on the worst end results. To explain more, if you make a small mistake at the workplace, you automatically imagine that you will be scolded for it or even fired for it. You will be jobless; then how will you manage your bills and expenses?
- Filtering
Any positive thought is filtered out and focuses on negative thoughts without analyzing what is right and wrong. One single bad event will dominate your mind so much that you will neglect all positive events and only focus on the negative one. The most prevalent thought is, “Nothing good ever happens to me. Life is unfair, and there’s nothing I can do about it.”
Solutions for change Negative self-talk
- Awareness of Negative Self-Talk
Becoming aware of negative thinking patterns and their impact on mood and behaviour is the first step. Here are two examples to start doing that:
- Take some time out to analyze your thoughts and inner voice. Stop and say it loudly: “What’s the thought? What is driving it? How am I feeling?”
- Any technique to get your thoughts down on paper can improve your awareness of negative thinking and help you become more in tune with yourself.
- Challenge Negative Self-talk
Recognize negative thinking patterns and replace negative sentences with positive or affirmative ones. For example, instead of saying, “I am never going to get this right”, challenge the thought and replace it with, “I am doing my best, and my best is enough”. Train your mind and shift your focus to the positive side.
- Practice Positive Self-talk
One way is to count your blessings. When negative self-talk begins, try shifting your attention to the positive in your life, no matter how small it is. Starting from the day you are born, the basic facilities, achievements, etc. that you have in your life Identify as many things as possible that you are thankful for and dominate the feeling of gratitude. This is a simple yet powerful way to break the cycle of negativity.
- Step Outside of yourself
Sometimes try to think about and analyze situations from others’ perspectives. Try reanalyzing from the point of view of someone who has already faced the same situation: “What would my best friend say?” or “What would my father have done if he were in the same situation?” Analyzing situations from different perspectives gives clarity.
- Talk It Out
Sometimes you need to lean on your support system to get out of your head. Talking to someone in your network, a loved one, or a therapist can help you sort out what’s reality and what’s just your negative thinking about yourself and the world.
- Visualization
Sometimes taking a break and stepping away from negative thoughts is the best thing to do. Visualize the whole situation and replace all negative thoughts and sides with positive ones. Visualization is an effective skill to manage thinking and increase a sense of control over thoughts. Visualization is most of the time manifested in reality. To make it more clear, visualize life without addiction, routine, day and night, slowly and gradually it in actually imbibed in behaviour.
- Focus on the Present Moment
Mindfulness is a tool that provides a sense of relief, giving you the ability to stop and refocus. Wherever your mind weaves, you have the power to bring it back to this moment and focus on the hope within the present. Several ways can be implemented, such as breathing exercises, grounding, and meditation, to help focus on the now and break free from the grip of negative thoughts.
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