Generally, females are more emotional and nurture every relationship with lots of care, so the breakup hits hard and instantly. Whereas males are emotionally strong, they do not cry often or express their grief publicly. It is observed that men take longer than usual to realize their emotional loss. Sometimes the nature of men is misinterpreted, and a partner starts to think that he never loved you at all. Their non-expressive poker face and indifferent behaviour, where they exhibit their vulnerable side, are not usually something men appreciate in their behaviour.

If we compare how women react to breakups with that men, then we will notice that women lock themselves in rooms, isolate themselves from their surroundings, create their imaginary sad world, and keep on mourning the death of their relationship. While men hang out with boys gangs, they are often seen partying and drinking, etc. However, everyone has a different way of dealing with heartaches, and the period also depends on the individual, the tenure of the relationship, and the bonding that they shared while being in a relationship.

Now, the question is why do breakups hurt guys later? Are they stone-hearted so that emotional loss doesn’t matter, or do they lack compassion and emotional quotient? There are many different understandings of men and breakups. In this blog, we will try to figure out why this terrible separation affects males after a certain period.

Reason 1: Men suppress feelings

Boys from a very young age are told not to cry openly or exhibit their emotions to others. Mostly, they grow up with the understanding that crying is a sign of weakness and that men are meant to be strong. Due to this, men tend to suppress their emotions more than women. Moreover, men are not used to discussing how they feel about bad past events. They bottle themselves up, where they hide pain and sadness. In doing so, men often pretend to be busy or indifferent about expressing their actual feelings. They convince others and themselves with the feeling that they are absolutely fine and that it’s no big deal when things happen. This is one of the reasons why it might seem like they’re not hurt at all when, in fact, they’re just disguising it.

Reason 2: Men influenced by male models

Many times, men try to imitate toxic male TV or movie models. In scripted shows, male models, after sudden unfortunate events, are often shown partying with friends to stay away from pain. Most men follow in similar footsteps because they need to maintain a strong image in front of everyone. The most obvious reaction to a breakup for any human, irrespective of gender, is to cry and mourn, and men cannot do it, so they hide, disguise, and pretend to be indifferent by doing all activities that do not express their inner sad feelings. 

Reason 3: Men deal independently

Well, men do not depend on anyone else or lean on them for emotional support. Men are generally very hesitant about asking for help or taking on anyone’s obligation. Similarly, men hesitate to communicate and seek help after a breakup. While women on the other side keep on sharing their life stories with everyone, cry over them, and lean on family and friends for emotional support, But males, on the other hand, are stubborn, adamant, and headstrong, so it takes longer to get over a relationship.

Reason 4: Men expect their ex to change

Generally, men are dominant in governing the home, business, or relationship. They dump a girl in the expectation that she will return to her and he will have the upper hand in the relationship. They keep waiting for females to analyze their mistakes or make some sort of adjustment, which men are unwilling to do. So if the girl wants to stay in a relationship, she should change according to male expectations, not the other way around. In hopes that their partner will come back, men often stay in denial and refusal states, where they are not ready to accept that their relationship is over.

Now the reality of a breakup hits men hard when their ex moves on with another relationship. Until that time, males keep on hoping for their ex to come back and stay in a state of denial, which internally gives them the feeling of being in a relationship.

Reason 5: Men initially deny and then reflect

Due to the male ego, they never accept their faults and keep finding errors in their partners. Usually, men blame their partners for any unfortunate incidents, reasons, or loopholes in a relationship. Men tend to deny their mistakes, unwilling to minimize their faults, and 90% blame their partners for the breakups. This self-echoing ego makes it difficult for them to understand the actual reason for the breakup. But as soon as they start dwelling on their behaviour, that’s when they start accepting the real situation.

As a takeaway from the blog, breakups are really difficult, whether for men or women. Everyone’s way of dealing with a breakup depends on the nature of the relationship, the nature of the breakup, the nature of the two individuals, and the strength of their bond. No guide or rulebook can be followed for the painless and smooth process of breaking up for either gender. I feel we should try to give each other a chance and forgive, and the more you surrender in the relationship, the more the flavour of it can be tasted. This whole journey of being in a relationship is not about only staying with loved ones; it’s actually about focusing on improving ourselves. The more one tries to find their faults in a relationship, the longer the relationship lasts.